... last chance ...

Damn.





=(

... feverish ...

Barely recovered from my earlier round of flu/cold, I'm sick again -_-

As before, started with a sore throat and then headache last Fri before turning into a full-out ongoing fever and frequent coughing fits since...

.
.

Plus, haven't yet started studying for the all important resit and exams. With less than 2 weeks left.

.
.
.

And as if that's not enough, I can't find my spectacles and case. Not to mention a whole lot of missing currency.


=


Aargh, everything's so not helping!


*then again, the 'bright' side is that I'll be able to go back to KL by end of the year if I fail the Nov exams - albeit lost of future and all*

Europe '09

*work in progress*

Apologies. Expected completion date - Dec 2008.

Germany '09

*work in progress*

Apologies. Expected completion - Nov 2008.

... mock ...

Results are out.

Failed one and passed the other. And of course, it had to be the worse one to fail. As expected. Though it didn't matter much which paper it was - I'll still have to study everything again. Sigh.

Now I've got to resit it together with case study, early this Nov. Which will be my last chance.

And I've only got 2 weeks filled with work to prepare for it, since I already have the coming month booked for my whole year's worth of holiday. Great timing, eh? =(


Crap.


... and I'm not even feeling sad about the results.
*most likely because the Europe trip is at hand and nothing else worth staying on for - which is so not going to help me finish my exams o.O*

* * *

On an entirely different note, MO is coming to UK to further her studies. At least I'll get to meet up with her once before she moves on to Leicester from London.


And on the other hand, CE will be going back KL for good.

*so that makes 6 ppl having gone back this year, and still counting...*

... jaded ...

Nowadays after watching a really good show, I've stopped imagining whether such a character could exist in real life.


Let's face it - no such one could ever exist in reality. But it's like, one's subconscious has finally given in and admitted defeat. As though even the mere possibility no longer crosses the mind, not even a cynic thought to dismiss what little false hope which remains. For it's long gone, and I didn't notice when...

* * *

Finished Goong in a weekend. Watched it because of the lead actress, re-watched it straightafter because of the lead actor. Nothing close to Coffee Prince but enough to be addictive on its own all the same. In an imaginary world where an imaginary me could be the lead, the Crown Princess' role would be a dream come true *the ultimate dream would be if it was set in China* - You get the best of both worlds. Sigh.


Which led on to the Korean movie Antique, where Joo Ji Hoon was absolutely adorable *practically unrecognisable from his debut role Shin in Goong*. Movie wasn't great, they tried to pack too much into too little and spin it by you too fast for my liking *especially the 1st half* - but the actors were very suited for their roles. Ah, wasted potential there. Definitely would be better if it was a 2 part or mini-series instead.



Anyway, was walking home while listening to my Walkman and randomly enough, songs from the Coffee Prince soundtrack were shuffled up. Which got me thinking... If they make a Korean live action version of Ouran, wouldn't Yoon Eun Hye make a wonderful Haruhi *based on Coffee Prince* and Joo Ji Hoon be the perfect Kyoya *see Antique ^_^*? Then again, it'll be practically impossible to cast for the Hitachiin twins and Honey senpai...

Coffee Prince

I love it!


Ok, it must have been too long since I last watched any drama. Thanks to CE for introducing it to me. We watched some of the middle episodes at her place after my exams, she being already hooked on it and didn't want to watch anything else while I was glad to just bum around.


Not that I'd watched many kdramas before *and usually don't like some enough to finish the series*. The more popular ones tend to be typical - much like how Taiwan dramas are in comparison to Hong Kong ones. But Korean ones have definitely surpassed the cliche-soap-opera league, and taken it to an entirely new level. *not to mention that kdramas don't usually rely on just eye candy for leading roles*

Or maybe it's just so easy for me to forgive the cheesy/corny/teary/flaky-fake-laugh-y/cliche-y bits of the story when it comes gift-wrapped with such drool-worthy soundtracks to aid one's obsession.

Great music not only sets the ambience, but allows one to relive the passion and emotions long after 'the end'. Especially if the soundtrack sounds as though it has been put together with a lot of tlc just for it *like Ouran* ^_^ Just remember to avoid listening to a famous soundtrack before watching the show itself as it's more than likely to impair your enjoyment of the scene *made that mistake with Noir, which I still haven't finish the rest of the series -_-* Then again, it's just me who's distracted by such trivial background stuff... Oh, and eye candy's always a plus.


One thing about Coffee Prince *and probably why I like it best* is that it's so refreshing. This could be because I've been deprived of good entertainment all this while. But really, it's absolutely unpretentious, the story's not exaggerated, doesn't make one feel like pulling one's hair in frustration and wondering why one's still watching *they might have dragged the 'not-telling-him' part a teeny bit too much, but at least things don't get blown so out-of-proportion that it takes more than 1 episode to resolve*, leaves you feeling happy *even after sad scenes*, beautiful compilation of songs, ... most of all, great chemistry within the cast.

Seriously, all 4 main characters were great for their roles. This is the first time I've watched Yoon Eun Hye *yes, I have not watched Goong* and her acting is brilliant here as the 1st heroine. Cute, sincere, endearing, and it never once felt strange to see her acting against the other 3 more mature cast. She was just... so natural. Makes me want to watch Goong *though I'm betting she's not as good there*. I think the only reason why I never once cried during the whole thing is because she does it so well that I'm just happy to watch o.O

1st hero Gong Yoo didn't interest me at first (he kept reminding me of some HK actor whom I couldn't remember at first while watching it at CE's place, but now that I've finished it I realised it was Lui Fong *a taller-lankier-cheekier version :p wonder if Dodo Cheng's seen Gong Yoo*). I definitely preferred the 2nd hero Lee Sun Gyun (who's more good-looking, with a nice deep voice, and really looks like Francis Ng when he's got his specs on) *yours truly: one-who-watches-too-many-tvb-dramas-and-doesn't-meet-enough-people-in-real-life*, paired perfectly with the 2nd heroine Chae Jung Ahn (who was beautiful, smart, successful, and surprisingly not irritating *kdramas too often have a prettier-but-bitchier female 2nd lead and I'm glad that there's no villain here for once*).

The 1st hero did steal most of the limelight towards the end *the later episodes didn't give much scope for the 1st heroine to shine anyway* where he's got more chances to be cheeky as well as adorably jealous and impatient. There'll never be someone like his character in real life, but I'm pretty sure I'll melt if I so much as overhear any guy singing Norul Saranghae like that to any other girl from now on +_+ *this song has officially made the list of my top favourite love songs ever - actually, I can't remember ever having a favourite love song until now...*


Gong Yoo *voice's not bad* and Yoon Eun Hye *previous professional singer* should do a duet version of that song, it would definitely sell ;) Their characters are made for each other *she being not girlie, he being an obnoxious softie* and they're just too adorable together *even all the kissing were natural*. And the perfect 2nd couple completes the set, looking fabulous together. Out of the 4, I think Gong Yoo will definitely have the hardest time in future if he tries to play another good-guy cheeky character as people will remember him for this role instead. The other 3 seem more versatile to me, especially Yoon Eun Hye *looking forward to her next leading role*.


And manager Hong was a riot all by himself. *he's got a good singing voice too*


This is definitely one show that I can watch again and again, that I would't mind collecting it. Did I already mention the great collection of songs used in the series? ^_^ Now, if only I can find some sheet music for piano.


And another fix =(



... craving for kim chi fried rice.

France '09

*work in progress*

Apologies. Expected completion - Nov 2008.

... deja vu ...

Is it just me or history's repeating itself too much?


Lately, things seemed to be happening. Again. As though once isn't enough. Judging from the pattern, it's not looking good...



Didn't study much, bottom of class in the mocks, unemotional, ... Not to mention that a bee decided to get itself trapped in my room the morning before my exams -_- *was up early on a rare and much-needed spurt of studiousness* Yes, again.
This time it's definitely a bee (with yellow stripes), and a much angrier one at that.
*why oh why does my room attract insects with stings?*



For some reason, I woke up crying that day from a nightmare *actually, I woke up, and then cried o.O*. Maybe it's all that subconscious stress dammed up and awaiting release at first sign of the simplest trigger *usually a not-that-sad-and-a-touch-of-cliche scenes from any movie will do it - especially if it's about mistreated animals*. But I've never been one to cry from dreams, the last time was probably before I started school? One would have pretty much been used to it by now given the frequency of my anything-but-sweet dreams, and believe me, didn't really had anything to cry about at all.

In fact, this one can qualify as a movie with epic-like proportions. I've always had too much of an imagination.

*family on trip, somehow having blockbuster-like attempts at our life, running in the open and looking for escape routes (it was one of those crossroads at Bank :p), one of them being entrance to the underground subway but rejected that when I saw a young lad entering it with a rifle slung over his shoulder (just goes to show that I'm never a hero), turned the other way instead towards some big-convention-centre-like-building but it got blown up in front of our eyes, the only way being south and ran to the jetty, hiding underneath the planks while stopping to get our breaths back, were found by the enemy, a long time 'friend' of my dad's where they've been competing with each other since childhood, the guy having sufferred injuries from all those blowing-up attempts and still trying to kill my dad in revenge, both of them sitting on a log, my dad still thinking that his 'friend' meant well at heart and was only a bit misled, lighting a last cigarrete for his dying 'friend', dad asking him how many cigarretes he's had in life, the guy finally gave up his last desperate attempts of trying to burn dad with cigarretes, answered a number, whereupon dad gave it some thought and came up with a number of his own, concluding that it was indeed quite a number, me being frustrated throughout this whole exchange as I knew he was the enemy, that they were both enjoying their last cigarettes, and I was crying while telling my dad that no, he can still have a few more...*



Just finished exams yesterday, and they were no good at all. Didn't finish either paper. Also, didn't feel tired after the exam - obviously hadn't written much quantity, let alone quality of answer. Really, it's all so deja vu. Sigh. Reminiscent of the time I failed that paper. *also had to go on a trip soon after the exam*

This must be the first time where I've had to go home after an exam and re-read the same notes for the next exam, recognising mistakes with every turn of the page and fighting the natural habit to forget everything after stepping out the exam hall.



... please let me not have to do it all again =(

... flat peaches ...

Walking around a market for lunch and came across these near-adorable fruits in season...

...flat peaches...

^_^ reminds me of small peachy cushions.

*someone said they look like a monkey's ass -_- granted - more like a baboon's actually, but don't tell me that while I'm eating them*


Not sure if it's a different species or just made to grow like this *quite likely since I've never heard of flat ones before and they do look and taste like usual ones, just squashed in a way*, but they are rather easier to eat around the seeds than the common variety. They also have flat nectarines too, by the way.


A better picture found through google...

.. fresh cherries are also in season too. Mmm.

... panic mode ...

Help...

Exams in 2 weeks, haven't started studying, didn't even touched the notes since we got them more than 5 weeks ago.

And this time, everything we *supposedly* learnt before will be assumed knowledge o.O they can test you anything they like from the previous 12 exams *I'd been exempted for 3, so my memory has to go back more than 3 years to college...* on top of the new advanced stuff.

Only small consolation is that we can bring in notes for these exams. And I have none =( *can't exactly take in the stacks of text?!*

Tomorrow will be the first of 2 mocks before the actual. Tonight, I just took the dusty study materials out from under the junk piled on the floor of my room, and putting them into the file to bring in tomorrow. That's it. The same ones I haven't read or touched since we pretty much got them. And the brief glimpses of what they contained didn't mean anything to me at all.

Crap.

*I am so failing the mocks already*

What's more, still haven't finished all bookings. Expecting to leave for France 2 days after my exams. With no accommodation booked to date :s

All of a sudden, I've got more things to do these days than in the last 2 years combined. Sigh, leave me alone.

...panic.

.. exams in a fortnight ...

This is just not my month...


Well, it never seems to be mine anyway, though this recent one has definitely been closer to doom. *worse than the one before*



College, Europe trip plans, late sleepness nights, work, more Europe trip decisions, change of plans *for the 2nd major time -_-*, booking of new ones, work, borderline insomnia, not-studying guilt, M moving house, more work, more guilt, summer sales, people calling to ask me to study *thanks, honestly!*, impending pay cut, DX leaving for KL, EL coming to town, still more work, the Ryanair fiasco, even still more work... an end is nowhere in sight =( *well, not one that involves a happy ending anyway*

So much so that my mind's been reduced to being in droning stagnancy *is there even such a word?* at work with all thoughts being stucked actively in my head *work or not* - tired but never really sleeping. Not to mention faster rises to anger and impatience. No mincing of words. More stuttering at work and less of the usually clear-headed self o.O *so not the time to be under-performing*



And where does the studying fit in? Sigh, yet to start.



... help needed.
*or at least, a piano*


p/s: DX, have a safe flight! You'd be back in KL anyway by the time you read this :) Will definitely miss ya...

... ralphie 'n' mj ...

Decided last weekend that I'd let myself take one day for shopping and checking out the summer sales. So went out on Sun.


And all I ended up buying was some basic briefs and a small giraffe soft toy -_-

...ralphie...

Yes, I don't need one. But aw... tell me it ain't cute ^_^

...yes, it does seem to be modeled from a cow...

*I'm not returning you xx*

* * *

Met up with DX for dinner today, Nandos again. I do think Nandos here is so much better than that available back home although one tends to get more burnt wings over here, but I guess it depends on the branch *wings not even on menu when I was back home anyway*.


Before dinner, we dropped by the New Look nearby for a browse and I bought a pair of killer heels o.O They're totally high at roughly 4 inches from the floor *3 inches in heels since 1 inch's due to the platform bit* with chunky wooden platforms that have holes in them. The fact that they're called 'chopper' should be more than enough to understand what I mean by killer...

...front/top view...


...side view...

*there's actually another see-through slit underneath the toe side of the platform :p*

Yes, I know. I definitely don't need them. No reason to wear them, nowhere to go in them too. I'm more likely to sprain an ankle and break a leg if there's an emergency, after falling down first *shrugs* though they could be quite a handy tool for defense if it comes to that. Not to mention effective weights for exercising and toning of legs. Plus they were on sale and I must say, it was a very quick buy for someone as usually indecisive as me. *I took ages to decide on the giraffe soft toy, although it's a quarter of the price of these funky killers* I just love the petal-shaped gap in those heel-cum-platforms which makes them look not as chunky as the usual selections over here. But there's no way I'll get to wear them here, and definitely not in KL. *unless I'm ever likely to be chauffered driven everywhere*


So, should I return the choppers? =(

* * *

Coming home, my landlady's daughter told me the latest news - Michael Jackson's gone! :'( Seriously, my normal routine *i.e. not in touch with any news* would usually mean I'd found out about something as big as this at least a month after *didn't knew we had a new PM until he's all sworn in and settling his cabinet -_-;*.


This is probably the first celebrity orbituary that I can relate to, the first mega star whose death would engendered more than the distant sadness. Before this, couldn't really connect as much with those of Anita Mui and Leslie Cheung because I'd never listen much to their songs *any song by any artist, for that matter* and especially so since I'm a certified hermit when it comes to the latest entertainment.


But if I'd grew up to any artist's hits, it'll be Michael Jackson's - from remembering the original music videos *Beat It, Black or White, the moonwalker one on the moon* being shown on TV when I was a small child to staging a Thriller show for Everybody's Day in school *the only time I'd gotten to wear a proper costume ^_^*. The moonwalk was all the rage *and still is, in my opinion*. Those hits would always be part of my favourite list, including the classic Heal The World *I used to memorise the lyrics for We Are The World, but it lacks the touching impact when compared to Heal The World*. His later works weren't really my cup of tea, but I still appreciated the message from his Earth Song *the video's pretty cool, though a bit too much stamping and yowling*. Even with all the controversy and eccentricity which came later, he was good. Very talented. Besides, that keeps him thriving in the background of the entertainment world anyway. And he was about to stage his last show too... *we'll be hearing more of him pretty soon*



Guess that just goes to show I'm definitely getting older.




... this is it.

... dark bliss ...

Scary how one likes being depressed.



I actually like it when it really strikes. Suddenly. For no immediate reason.
*that is, not to say that there were no reasons, just no one single directly attributable cause*


'Cos then, for those brief almost rare moments, I don't need to - and won't - care. Ah... to wallow, to grief, to let it runneth over.

... waltz ...

After a lengthy break, there's another class being held and went today for my 3rd *near* tango attempt. Just repeated some basic 2-8 steps and the 1st hour was over before I knew it.

The 2nd hour was voted for waltz this time and I decided to stay for my first try, since I'm just interested in learning more dancing in general. And there were less girls than guys this time round, so definitely less guilt for imposing my beginner self on the lot.


There must be a pattern somewhere. My first try at following the class and the teacher decided to try out some 'gold' level stuff too -_-


Lesson of the day:

• waltz is harder than tango *I had thought the opposite was true, and was apparently completely mistaken*
• I'm horrible at following the lead of my partner *ok, I'd always suspected this and nothing unexpected there, but it's still quite something else to be proven right after all - in my defence, they weren't doing it right either :p*

Today actually felt more of a work out, or maybe it's too hot that I was sweating soon anyway. As noted, ballroom dancing is definitely more achievable on heels than flats. I need to shop for bearable shoes after all...


Still not a proper class, but always good to be able to force myself to exercise a bit.
*I recently discovered that I've become absolutely hopeless when faced with a can and a can-opener =( a task which never presented a problem before since back in my school days*

... broke ...

Friday was ML's birthday and we had Lebanese for dinner. The bill was at least 30% more expensive than we'd expected. I'd also gotten lost trying to find the place, whereupon I'd seen more than enough flyovers of London and hitherto discovered that there actually is a 'Little Venice' canal, all within Paddington Central o.O

Met some of ML's friends from Singapore who happened to be on the last day of their trip. Played a bit of mahjong and some bridge at their place until about 4am. Then headed back to my place to catch a few winks before meeting DX in Oxford Street in the afternoon.


DX's done with all her exams and going home in less than a month's time. Am really gonna miss her =(



I should go shopping more when I'm broke and feeling tired or depressed. Won't end up buying much then :p *hopefully* I fared quite well this time since I didn't buy anything *proud* ok, I was this close to getting *yet* another dress from Topshop, quite a plain one-colour top *not black! haha...* which was surprisingly affordably priced *for Topshop*. I'd probably end up getting it anyway on a later trip -_-



And today, finally made some flight bookings for my Europe trip! Well, some that actually involve me travelling as well. At least, this is the first step that brings me closer to the trip actually happening...



Oh, and I also booked a short 2 days trip to Frankfurt to visit *NB: kacau!* CY, before she goes back KL for good.




... so, of course, I'm broke :(
*and still got accommodation to book next too*

... random bites ...

When you're with ML in company, there's never a dull moment...



We met up for dinner today as I wanted to pass her some of the tea eggs to try. She recommended a Vietnamese noodle place called Viet Pho, a small restaurant with a relatively big queue. When it was going to be our turn to be seated, it was obvious that the next table available would be for 4. The pair behind us asked if we mind and we readily agreed to share the table *well, it'll take even longer to wait for a table for 2 anyway*.

Once seated, the guy said he was going to buy a bottle of wine and kindly asked if we drink. I said you guys go ahead. ML asked if it was their treat -_-; While he was out, the lady and ML wasted no time and was already in deep conversation *they were sitting on the same side* before the waitress came to take our orders.

I'd decided on having the same thing as ML since she already knew what she wanted, it was my first try of Vietnamese fare, and that was the next best sounding dish on the menu which didn't involve beef in any way. The other couple were first-timers as well, so ML started recommending dishes from the menu. The couple turned out to be married, lived in France, wife doing MBA in London while husband on secondment to Abu Dhabi.


Honestly, I sympathise entirely with the waitress. It was hard enough dealing with 2 parties in the same table who appear to be having a pleasant time sharing said table even before orders were placed. But with Ml added into the mix? Nothing against her, mind you *quite hard to, actually :p*. But if you never knew a person who's random, you've never met someone like her.

There's an uncanny quality about her that even friends can easily become amusingly confused. Not to mention the rare ability to say somthing that often isn't vague, yet could clearly and contradictorily be taken to mean more ways than one. On this occasion, for example, she responded to the waitress' query on whether there'll be a single bill for the table in a way which conveyed an impression of 'yes, only 1 bill' while actually intending 'no, separate bills please' -_- *I know because I confirmed my suspicions with her once the waitress was gone*. We only found out later after the food arrived that ML had only been there once before, ordering the one same dish, despite her eager recommendations - the arrival of the 1st starter she ordered and didn't recognise was a dead giveaway *poor waitress had to take the dish away upon seeing our blank faces and placed it down again in front of us after checking at the counter that she was right*.


Then again, you can't wish for better company when entertaining or dealing with strangers. ML is quite the veritable source for amusing anecdotes *many from personal experience too :p* and an absolute minefield for generating random conversation topics. Without even having to try. She is also quite capable of carrying on several different conversations on several unrelated subjects with the same person, all at once in the span of 1 usual conversation. And continuing after, picking up a line of thought from some other past conversations without warning. One has to multitask just to keep up and remain coherent. Or, say, develop schizophrenic properties in listening.


This must be why our table of strangers was a merry party of 4 in no time at all, touching on *in rough order of sequence, as far as I can remember* wines in the afternoon, iphones, chinese bananas, the gastronomic experience *at one point, ML was gushing about Gordon Ramsay's table bookings and switching directly to KFC, the chemistry of, in less than 10 seconds*, guys in pink shirts, french kissing *the apparent myth of*, Buddhism and non-beef Buddhists, origins of the no-pork policy in Islam, drag queens on Japanese national TV, university lecturers and children's school teachers who aren't afraid to flaunt their sexiness *and sexuality*, exchanging restaurant recommendations, the meaning and origins of 'kiasu', towns over-crowding with tourists in Southern France, the merits and logistic value of lodgings in Bayswater, barter trade between local arabs and foreign women, dim sum and the inadvertant flirt,...

Do you even begin to see a pattern? o.O
*no prizes in guessing which of the above was my only salient contribution to the conversation -_-*


And so in 2.5 hours and moving from dinner to a quick coffee/dessert *went to this quaint pattisserie nearby recommended by the couple, after we walked around Chinatown once with ML and I being unable to think of a decent Chinese place which didn't require a min charge/dish per person or serves dessert only before 10.30pm*, friends were made and contacts exchanged between ML and the wife.


*somehow, the whole thing felt like me playing the bored bf/husband supporting role to ML... ML and the wife were chatting happily soon after we sat down, while the husband and I attempted to make conversation and exchanging the knowing looks that husbands share when their wives are otherwise preoccupied with enthusiastic conversations in the way females often do among themselves. ML even uttered the classic phrase along the lines of 'you guys should talk too' while waving a hand at the husband and I -_- then again, I'm not known for being feminine anyway. Oh, and ML was walking with a hand through my arm all the time, although that was because she had fallen down the stairs earlier in the week and hadn't fully recovered yet*


It is somehow both comforting to know that I'm poles apart from ML, and yet resignedly disquieting that I can't afford to be like ML.





... naturally anti-social me.

tango?

Had always wanted to go for dance classes, but avoided the expense. So when ML asked if I wanted to join her for some tango classes at £2 an hour, I readily jump at the idea ^_^ Tried it out last week, which happened to be only her 3rd time while I was a complete novice.


It was Argentine tango, not too technical and was more of an informal class really. Anyway, my first time happened to be when the teacher decided to teach the more 'advanced' steps to the beginner class o.O managed to made it through safely without a single fall, although I was in full work clothes and heels too *due to the fact that it was quite last minute - ML, being ML, was pretty vague and only called up with details an hour before class was due to start -_- thinking that she was just waiting for my answer*. The heels probably were the most suitable shoes I have over here for such activities, and I did think all the swivel moves were certainly easier if you're on your toes *not to mention to reduce slightly the vast height differences between me and whoever my partner was :p*.


And today, after pressing ML for the actual address to attend my 2nd class, I discovered to my chagrin that I had been led to trapsed exhaustingly all over the roads in heels and taking buses last time for nothing when the hall was 15 minutes walk from my place in reality! *grrr*



Oh well, I suppose I should be grateful for being introduced to an affordable dance class *not to mention good excuse to force some exercise* that's held so close to my place after all.


By the way, also found out today that it's actually a ballroom dancing club at the residential hall which just happens to be doing tango and waltz for now - and more importantly, isn't restricted to members only ;)

... tea eggs...

Remember the cooking book I got over here?



The first thing I tried, a very simple recipe for tea eggs...

... first try ...

... yes, simple. Though I think there's probably one herb or ingredient missing to get it nearer to the taste of those we have back home - you know, those steaming eggs in aluminium rice cookers being sold in hypermarkets or shopping complexes that always seemed to smell much nicer than they taste. Also, the soya sauce here doesn't taste good *although this shouldn't be a factor since that cooking book was written for UK non-chinese?*.

But for a first try, I'd say it was definitely acceptable :) *knowing me, any subsequent tries will never taste as good as the first time* Only made 3 to experiment. The next batch, made about 18 - made sense to make a batch at a time and give some to the landlady and family, not to mention friends. This time there was slightly longer time to simmer too, though can't let them simmer as long as those sellers do.

...2nd batch...

* * *

It was a long weekend since it's Easter and as usual, I've been moulding in my room. Since it's been relatively more sunny *this early too, looks like a good summer coming*, CE and I ended up going to a nearby park for a mini-picnic. Well, we'd always wanted to have a proper picnic in Hyde Park or something... so this is a small step closer to that goal ;)

It was actually quite chilly outside, the park being small with no flowers... but it was still a good chance to wriggle my toes for some airing as I realised they haven't been seeing sunlight for ages :p

We had self-made salmon wraps, a banana or two, some basic chips, and there was a cute, very active and very sociable dog which went round asking strangers in the park to throw his ball for him to fetch - by dropping it down in front of people's feet and barking at them. Aw... ^_^ Definitely my highlight of the entire 'park outing'. The pigeons, on the other hand, were too close for my comfort. *the complete reverse with CE, who didn't mind pigeons but definitely didn't want the dog to come nearer*


Well, we only sat for a while and went to New Look afterwards :p But I definitely want to go to a park somewhere and just relax with a good book. Hopefully that will be quite achievable, given the forecasted warm weather ahead...

... either way ...

Quoted from a good friend's blog, MF...
*my sentiments exactly, though I'll never be able to phrase it so concisely*


If someone tells you that you can do it, you might not be able to. Likewise, if someone tells you that you can’t do it, you might be able to…and you probably will just to prove that you can. So why listen? Why ask? Just do it!

If someone doesn’t believe you, there’s no use in explaining. If someone believes you, there’s no need in explaining. So why explain? Why try? Just shut up!

If someone thinks you’re mature, you have your reason for everything you do, be it known or unknown. If someone thinks you’re immature, everything you do is childish and playful. So why grow up? Why pretend? Just be who you are!

If someone hates you, everything you do is wrong or not good enough. If someone loves you, everything you do is right or understandable. So why think? Why bother? Just don’t care!



... either way, it doesn't matter ^_^

... manga ...

Running out of fuel...



Anyone feel like recommending some mangas or books to read? ^_^;



Seeing as the only way I can refuel is through online manga *miraculously still have access to* and library books *definitely exhausted much of the Terry Pratchett variety*, I have been going through them like chocolate since. Well, much more than chocolate. Some of my latest read, briefly :p


Fruits Basket

It's good. Really! *as if you need telling*

Always knew that it's supposed to be good, but I was still afraid that I might be expecting too much and being let down all too often. The graphics in particular was very pleasing to the eye ^_^ and the pacing was well-planned, although the storyline did get a bit draggy past the halfway mark. I love the way the mangaka managed to portray all those emotions and deep character development *just love Kyo and Hatsuharu!*. Absolutely can't wait to watch the anime now! *anyone know where I can get my hands on a copy?*

For some reason, I had somehow know all along that the original manga is better than the anime although I can't recall where I read it or who it was who told me that *sorry!*. I only remember telling others that the manga is supposed to be loads better than the anime, at a time where I've obviously haven't seen either *yeah, I'm unfortunately arrogant like that*. Although I haven't watch the anime yet, I know I won't regret reading the manga first and I doubt the anime would let me down later, judging from it's popularity... Hm, I should probably wait a while before doing so. Wouldn't want leftover feelings from the manga to influence my enjoyment of the anime :p Now, if only I can get my hands on a copy...


Vampire Knight

This was ok.

Good premise of plot *I'm quite the fan of the twisted dark deep destiny variety* and creation of characters *love Zero's character background but the introduction midway of the twin brother / hunter-family-twins-curse-thingy was definitely laying it on too thick*.

But I still think it's overhyped. There were so many parts of the story which showed promise and potential, but not exploited enough or lack of follow through. Read up to the current volume, which was just as well since the main arc just ended and hopefully not many fillers ahead. The anime's out last year and I haven't watch it yet, but I have a feeling I'm gonna enjoy it more than the manga. At least, I can readily imagine the anime producers improving on those bits which are underdeveloped... Also, is it just me or the Kaien character's supposed to be that blatant a tribute to Abel Nightroad from Trinity Blood?


Liar Game

Frankly, I have not heard of this until SK and WS were watching the apparently immensely popular Japanese drama version. The way the characters were illustrated grated on my nerves a bit *especially Nao's expressions in the first chapters -_-*, though I have to admit that they were quite accurate depictions of reality *Akiyama's, in particular, seem to remind me of someone possibly resembling Eason Chan o.O*. The intelligent plots were definitely interesting *another type which I enjoy immensely, especially Death Note (which was better and the first series I completed to the end)* although low-IQ-old-me can't seem to follow the more clever twists in the plots, giving up entirely on trying to keep up with the contestants's score during the 3rd round. This I also read to the latest available at that time which was the end of round 3, so it was a fitting place to stop and wait until more volumes are out.

Too bad I don't know any more manga of this kind other than Death Note... =(


Ayashi no Ceres

Given that I started reading this in a favourable light because the anime was one of my favourites *of the few I've watched, at least :p*, the manga didn't disappoint me. In fact, the anime had done a very good job staying through to the manga and condensing the main storylines into 24 episodes, although my one big gripe was that Shuro's character wasn't given much air time... The manga was longer *perhaps only from the perspective of one who's watched the anime* but has a lot more comedic parts and speculations of the tennyo legends. Supposed that's to be expected of the famous mangaka, who also did Fushigi Yugi *yet another one which I would love to get my hands on the anime or manga*. Still, I would definitely recommend the anime first over the manga for this one ^_^ it's got cool music, for one thing!


xxxHolic

Ok, definitely not the first manga one should read from the famous Clamp. My mistake -_- One should have read preferably Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle first. At least, before attempting xxxHolic. Otherwise, the storyline is too ambiguous for the uninitiated. Or maybe they just haven't gotten to the gist of the story yet, even after 170+ chapters...



Wow, that's quite a lot in a short span of time *i.e. within the last month* and I did read up to the end or latest chapter available for each one *even read 75% of Fruits Basket twice -_-;*. I must have been destined to be an otaku, though this has yet to manifest due to prevailing circumstances *being born in the wrong country, for a start*... *grumble grumble grumble*

I've read most of the ones I know *mostly because of the animes - one can always bank on a manga to be remotely interesting if it's got a well known anime version* and could feasibly obtain access by now, including FMA *didn't finish this one yet, interesting story but not as gripping after the first 70+ chapters - maybe because I've done the anime first*, Nana *ah, so beautiful... So addictive!*, Ouran *ranted before*, School Rumble *great comedy and surprisingly sweet at the same time*, ... Others like FMP, Trinity Blood, or Haruhi Suzumiya I've avoided because I'm still holding on to the hope that I can read the original short novels *though fat chance I would learn to read Japanese in my lifetime* before moving on to the manga franchise. And some others I've been setting aside for a rainy day either because it's very long and still ongoing *Bleach, Naruto, Detective Conan,...* or because I' m expecting it to be really good and thus saving for desserts *Nodame Cantabile, Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle,...?*. But mostly because I can't or don't know where to find them =(


Oh, and I think I'm spoiling myself too much by reading the great and beautiful works first *Nana, Fruits Basket,...*, so much so that I am very easily put off by less eye-candy ones *One Piece, Dragon Ball, Hana Yori Dango, the cover of Nodame Cantabile, and even first few chapters of Liar Game*. This despite the fact that I can't draw at all *sigh, how can I make my own manga?*.



Don't understand how people can wait weeks or months for the next chapter to be released. Perhaps it's to preserve one's sanity and not get too lost from reality. I would much prefer to wait for the whole series and devour it in one go, to get the maximum addiction reaction perhaps ^_^ even if it's ages after that when everyone else' already gotten over it and no one's so outdated as myself to entertain my rants and raves... But that's me.



... hm, what next?

... addict ...

Ok, I'm addicted to a lot of things. Nothing new there.


Funny how I can be addicted to stuff which I haven't been having a lot of and am too ignorant to qualify as a fan, much less an addict. Must be that sense of knowing the deprivation that makes it all the more luring and addictive.


Addicted to anime although I haven't watched that many or even know of many. Addicted to manga despite having read only a couple of volumes and just completed 1 full series for the first time before. Addicted to good fantasy writers although I'm not much of an expert when it comes to reading books *ok, I admit I used to be called a bookworm but that's a time ago and was only an illusion to my peers, given the surroundings we grew up in*. Definitely addicted to certain type of foods during certain times. Shopping hasn't made it that far yet at the moment *thankfully* but is definitely queueing up on the waiting list.

Crap, I've got no self-control or will-power whatsoever.


Despite working late hours everyday, piling on the stress and kilos, I somehow still managed to read manga til 4am every night. Not even the rare sound of birds chirping in the ever gloomy grey London sky could stop me from reading the next page or move me to finally shut down my computer to rest. For the first couple of weeks this happened, it was still consolable by the fact that the manga was a good one. But one can't deceive oneself longer as the weeks went on. And especially when you're running out of quality fare to fuel your time away.

Fact is *and I was all too aware of it as always*, it's just a convenient form of denial. I'd always thought of addiction as part of the denial family. Whether it's the immediate family or not *short of looking up a dictionary*, the relation is obvious and can't be further than a 1st degree cousin at any rate.


Addicted. Running away. Immersing oneself excessively. Retreating inwardly, avoiding endlessly. Absolutely nothing less than denial.



It's nowhere near the same as bearing the weight of the world on one's shoulders. Not as though life and death lay within the decision in my hands. So...?





... too lazy to stop living in limbo, that's why.

p/s: It's been 2 years here already, though I can't say this is unexpected.

... dance club ...

Sadler's Wells has this occasional dance club thingy which starts off with short classes and ends with club-like sessions. This time it was flamenco, so I went for it. The class wasn't anything special as expected *nothing too technical, just simple steps to try out and justify the notion of a 'class'* and the DJ didn't turn up last minute. All the same, it was affordable for a one-off thingy and I was treating it as an intro to flamenco anyway.

Of the Latin craze, stuff like tango and salsa didn't appeal to me as much as something like flamenco. Of course, I would love to learn all of it if possible but given the financial constraints, flamenco would be my first choice. It has a more fiery flair to it, sufficiently rhythmic, some stamping *but not as technical as tap*, no definite need of gymnastic flexibility, and lovely guitar music as accompaniment. Most of all *big determining factor for me*, it does not require a dance partner.


Ah, I wish I could afford regular classes in all dance varieties... I definitely need the exercise, at the very least. *particularly against the idea of going to the gym for any sort of 'regular exercise'* Surprisingly, I woke up the next day without any pains or aches. Just go to show it wasn't that much of a class in the first place and didn't warrant any exertion of efforts. Or maybe I'm just too self-conscious again to try my best...



... dance, anyone? =(

... grim realisations 3.0 ...

It's pathetic enough when the only people who ever asks you out in your entire sordid existence called life are the few strangers who happen to see you on the streets / buses / bus stops / some-random-public-area-where-they've-got-nothing-better-to-do-to-pass-the-time-and-obviously-any-random-bystander-of-the-female-persuasion-will-do. But it certainly doesn't help that they all seem to come from the same type of mold, THAT kind of people... Times like this, can't blame one for being prejudicial.


Yet another sign indeed.



*note to self - avoid that supermarket*

Not that I actually have any self-delusions that I would be remembered. Nor do I care. It's just that I need to forget. Desperately.





Wouldn't it be nicer if I was born a guy?

... birthday dinner ...

We went to Satay House.



Well, originally planned this dinner to be CNY-birthday-cum-farewell *had I failed the resit*. And also to introduce to some batchmates at work what Malay food is about ;) Ok, 4-in-1 then.

So after asking around, I decided to try out Satay House that was quite authentic *according to reports* and not too dowdy to bring guests to *bearable decor and pricy menus*.



Firstly, it took me more than 20 minutes just to find the place from the nearest tube station *was looking for Praed Street which was indicated in all the maps but somehow I found every other street for the next 5 blocks instead*. Which meant I was late. And they almost didn't give me the table I reserved for. Even though the restaurant was less than half full.

Secondly, while I was waiting for the table and the others to arrive, a couple of walk-in potential customers came in and asked for a table for 2. The head waitress straightaway told them that there were none available until 9pm when they said they didn't have a reservation, passing them a card and telling them to reserve for next time. All this transacted in front of me. With a couple of empty tables visible to all on the ground floor. I mean, just because there isn't a table for exactly 2 people doesn't mean they can't be seated elsewhere. And believe me, Satay House is nowhere near as posh to justify that kind of service and snobby waitresses *in case you're wondering, the nicest waitress there was a junior one and the only Malaysian*.

Then while the head waitress showed me to our table, I took the opportunity to ask where Praed Street was. I knew I shouldn't have bothered.



ZL and I finally sat down. Ordered some satay and teh tariks while waiting for YG to arrive. For their presumedly signature dish, the chicken ones were relatively ok but the lamb was tasteless. Not to mention hard to chew off the skewer. Ok, it did come served with some rice cubes *which were nasi impit instead of ketupat*, onions and cucumbers. But the peanut sauce was definitely lacking.

For main dishes, they left me to do the ordering since the dish names were Malay with english descriptions included, even after I warned them that everything I order would be spicy. Which to me, anything that looks nice on the menu would be spicy ^_^ So we had the beef rendang *hey, ordered for them to try (1 of our signature dishes, after all) and I only tasted the sauce a bit :p - quite tasty, but slightly too sweet/soury than original*, sambal tumis sotong *nicely hot but a bit watery than normal*, and belacan kangkung *which they called morning glorys on the menu o.O - but the best dish of the lot*. It was a cosy dinner with only 3 of us, hence no point going all out on the dishes.

And we chatted more over desserts, which was probably all the hot selections available on the menu. Bubur pulut hitam *not sweet enough*, sago gula melaka *with a huge lump of sago floating in not enough sauce*, and bubur kacang hijau *surprisingly good and thick, best dessert* - all came in small square-ish bowls which looked more like the decorative glass bowls that houses floating candles/flowers on restaurant tables elsewhere.



Oh, and the teh tarik was mamak-style authentic enough, but could definitely do better with more foam. Or even sugar.
*yes, I'm very fussy when it comes to food criticism - but I still eat too much of everything =(*


Still, it was a nice dinner overall and probably best available place to go for an introduction to proper Malay cuisine. Perhaps the lighting can be improved so people can actually see what they're eating *unless that's their strategy o.O* and service should be less uppity *entirely not reflective of what culture there is that the restaurant purports to represent*.



At least, I've tried it.

...a birthday present...

Thanks, guys!





So now I'm 24, but still act and feel like I'm 19, not to mention dressing and looking like I'm 15. Hm...

... snow in London ...

It's snowing...


^_^


Really. Not just the light drizzle kind. But proper snow, enough to cover roads and trees. In London!




Kids throwing snowballs over the fence at parked cars, all bus services suspended, schools were closed, even exams were cancelled.





... and there I am, inching along the snow / ice / slush on heels, on my way to work -_-



on a Mon.

...the view outside my window...


...outside the flat...


...on the way to work...


...at night, outside my window...


...my attempt at a mini snowman on my window ledge...

... chinatown CNY ...

Last Tuesday, finally got the chance to shop at Westfield London. It's what we Malaysians would call a shopping mall - with modern designs, wide open spaces, and nice seating areas to relax in. Finally, somewhere to shop which reminds you of home. Well, slightly reminiscent of Pavillion, at the very least. But despite its size, was disappointed by the number of shops available. Best was the designer village, but it's not exactly my cup of tea *or bowl of rice, for that matter* on a 'shopping' experience. So, although it is a nice place and all, I'd much prefer Oxford Street or Covent Garden any day. Not to mention closer at hand.

...interesting shop displays...


...the food court 'n' some curry puffs look-alike...

Started work on Wednesday, and it's been pretty busy since. Peak season's getting well under way for me.

Today, went out to see what the Chinatown celebrations are like this year. Didn't really make it last year since I was too lazy to go down on my own, but got CE to teman this year ^_^ And man, was it crowded. Not the usual chinese crowd, mind you. But loads of non-chinese milling around, who are of course, always taller than yours truly. With kids on their shoulders. Net result was I not only have to push my way along the street while trying not to lose sight of CE, but attempting to see my way without visibly jumping and dodging little children's feet from swinging right into my face...

...promotional stalls 'n' cute oxen souvenirs...

And me being jakun me ^_^ I bought one of those souvenir paper dragons!

Hahaha... I must be the only chinese holding something so obviously a gimmick in the middle of chinatown during their official day of celebrations. There were several stalls selling quite good quality chinese souvenirs *what can I say, I'm a real sucker for souvenirs*, lion dance *nothing quite as grand as the ones we have back home*, and even a stall for TVB channel subscriptions *hm, wonder which network they'll piggyback*.

...tvb or teletubby?...

*though of MF when taking this pic, btw*

Some people were giving out flyers and gold coin chocolates *nice!*, and we met a God of Wealth distributing red packets *mainly to non-chinese anyway, so don't need to speculate what's inside*. There's even supposed to be some food stalls, but we didn't attempt to push our way through the crowd much. Besides, from the colour of the paus that we saw some others eating in their hands, we probably wouldn't have bothered to try.

...the crowd at chinatown...

So, after pushing a bit and taking a few of the required pics, we decided not to break through the main street of Chinatown (Gerrard Street) and left instead. At least now I can say that I know what it's like to be there ;)



Headed for Malaysian Hall next, as there's supposed to be a CNY open house that day and CE hasn't been there before. We arrived after the stated time and as usual, people had to wait outside in the freezing cold *it was even snowing a bit in the morning* for the minister to arrive and start some speech or ceremony *cue eye rolling*. They even had a lion dance scheduled, but had chosen the Manchurian type instead which definitely lacked any sort of impact. We hung around until we couldn't wait anymore, and went for waffles instead. Think I was outdoors too long without enough preparation, 'cos the blood in my hands were so frozen that I had no idea how I managed to still hold the takeaway box and made it into the nearest heated shopping center, which was Whiteleys. Even then, it was some time before I could start feeling my fingers again and actually start eating my waffle properly. Which was a chocolate covered one with fresh fruit ^_^ and was delicious.

...lion dances at Queensway...

Ended up buying more stuff at Whiteleys rather than Westfield. And did you know there's even a WOFS branch in London? Sigh, globalisation continues...

...lilian too's feng shui working for her...



...nice advertisement 'n' decor all in one...

Then we shopped a bit and hung around, before I met up with L for dinner at Four Seasons. Yup, apparently she doesn't like roast duck back home and wanted to have more of Four Seasons' version before going back o.O
edit: Apparently, there's a Four Seasons branch back home too -_- Prefer our local road side stall roast duck any day!





By the way, HL went back for good at the beginning of the year, and now L is going too.





Oh, and it started snowing again during dinner, right on into the night.

...updated cny corner...

... CNY ...

This year's chinese new year eve dinner...

Invited CE over yesterday, a chance to add a new dish on top of last year's menu ;)

...steamed fish 'n' chai...



...ho si fatt choy 'n' kwai fa chi...

Ok, it was tung fan instead of sharks fins, with shrimps but no water chestnuts, and the chinese mushrooms were over-marinated *haha... didn't think that was possible really*. Oh, and I couldn't get the eggs to clump nicely. But not bad for a first attempt, no?
*my strange style of cooking -_- the first time experiments always prove tastier than my 2nd or thereafter attempts*



Also made the usual vegetarian dish yesterday and separated into 5 portions this time, 1 as accompaniment for dinner and 1 for my first meal on the 1st day.

...1st day meal...

Just gonna relax the whole day away.


^_^

...this year's CNY corner, with pineapple tarts!...

Ah, a holiday indeed.
*took leave again this year :p planning to visit Westfield tomorrow too*





Happy Chinese New Year!





... Last year's CNY eve

... one down, one more to hurdle ...

Guess what?


I passed! :D


Unbelievable, right? Seriously, it still hasn't settled in yet - even though the results came out yesterday, I double check the website a couple of times, and the letter came in the post today... Well, good news is, I'll still be around at least until summer ^_^



My department was also having some brief get-together yesterday and since it's going to be at the Somerset House skating rink this time (not to mention that I need to be around people I know for the news to fully sink in), I went out to join in the fun. Didn't skate in the end. Not that I'm any good at all, plus there's always the added torture of embarassing oneself in front of work colleagues who aren't really that close to you anyway but will nevertheless know that short girl falling around everywhere would be from their department. So I watched others skate instead :p

...somerset house ice skating rink...
*nicest rink in London, especially with the huge decorated tree they put up in the middle during christmas*

After that, we went for dinner at a small Italian place where the front door was tucked away in some very narrow back lane near Covent Garden. The atmosphere was excellent - dimly lit by candle light, pictures in frames covering every wall *including a bill signed by somebody or other*, and nice operatic music as accompaniment. Given the hefty prices *for some reason, a glass of their normal wine costs more than 2/3 of the price of 1 bottle of special wine on their menu* and simple parchment-paper menus *the owner who was trying too much to play the role of the temperamental Italian head waiter / host, in my opinion*, the food was a major letdown indeed. I wonder if they would just let me sit there and order a coffee with dessert for the whole evening instead, since the atmosphere is really nice. Though I doubt their desserts will be any good, judging from their main courses.

...the italian place...

Today, I followed my plan and went for lunch in Chinatown, so that I can get some essential preparing-for-CNY grocery shopping done before going home to spring clean my room. And as all my plans inevitably do, I ended up way behind schedule -_- Right now, I still haven't clear my room yet!


Really, it's just as well that I've been given a second chance or all this junk I've accumulated here will surely be of no use *not that it isn't going to end up as clutter anyway*. Man, I should stop collecting stuff.


At least, until I hopefully finish my contract and get a good payrise so that I can afford to rent a bigger room.



Still a long way to go...

...chinatown full of lanterns...

By the way, I only truly felt estatic at having scraped through this round when I sat down for lunch at this new Malaysian restaurant called Rasa Sayang in Chinatown today, and they were playing nice loud CNY songs! *the food was average, but they have this CNY only menu which I'm really looking forward to trying ^_^ looks quite promising with yu sang and a few choice selections of tai chau style dishes, including chilli crabs!* The other places were as silent as any other day, except that it was super crowded and a nightmare to queue to pay for just 1 bottle of red bean curd. Really, must be a Malaysian thing. When we celebrate, we celebrate indeed ^_^